chasing cars

so tak lama dulu aku baru tahu sebenarnya lagu ni lagu lama dah. padahal aku baru tau dan terus fall in love dengan lagu ni time ada update dalam blog Kd yang memaksa aku stream lagu ni dalam Youtube. Jadi amatlah suka dengan lagu ini. Post demi post aku keluarkan padahal banyak benda aku tak baca lagi. Bab-bab dalam buku cam Biochemistry and Physiology sememangnya memaksa aku tinggalkan terus walaupun aku ada buku rujukan, akan tetapi, disebabkan aku tidak ada basic idea on 'Wut-de-hek' are these two subjects, so, better just leave it. So better aku focus on subjects that i will taking the exams like anatomy and histology this semester, which, about 4 months from now on.

So, i'd really already decided on everything this semester, after talking to my mom, the most understanding person in this whole world, no matter how right i am, no matter how wrong i am, she still be at my side. I'd rather just 'PASS' the exams this semester, without those FLYING COLORS. I mean, usually i'll be aiming for '4' or if im lucky enough, im targeting for '5' in the exams. So, seeing at my situation this semester, i rather just give up all those hope in getting the Holy Red Diploma. Instead, i should just stay focus on the remaining knowledge that i should get this semester. You know, what was past was already past.

Actually, i really dont wanna put things to worst. But, giving hope, when we cant make it, it does and always hurts you so much. it has been always stressful when you just aiming 'i should get this, i should get that'. i already tried that way. and it work. sucks-fully. maybe the other Mara students can excel this semester, but not me. I far behind now. its not because im stupid enough (although i am stupider, urm, stupidest maybe) just aiming at those un-excellent scores 3 3 3 3, but, hey, I'M a month behind and ME expecting to cope all of that in seconds????? Nearly infinite impossible. Really.

What im trying to say here is, yes, really not going to give up. I should really try hard to make things correct AGAIN, reading all those brain-draining stuffs. The main point here is all about tawakal. Yes, im climbing a steep mountain. the high one. the most hottest one (?). well at least i will climb the mountain no matter how high no matter how fast no matter how pain i will get, no matter anything, but what i should get is, AT LEAST AND VERY LEAST, i can make it to there. im not just giving up that easy. make something to it, but, no hope in it. coz' hope is like a deadly minesweeper bomb. once step onto it, than, you'll be in pain forever.

so, this semester means that, lets waste time chasing cars around my head.

and still i cant forgive those who made me into this shitty trouble. tidak akan.

salam yakek-yakek. sorry no facty-facty post today.